Manliness and a Perfect Funeral

http://jenniferfitz.com/manliness-and-a-perfect-funeral/

A beautiful tribute to my beloved John.

grayscale photo of wheelchair

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Matthew 23

We learned of the allegations against Fr. Flores at our local Latin rite parish, at the end of Mass, and we were just gobsmacked in disgust and bewilderment.  Last week, before I learned of this, I was in a discussion about priests and them not understanding women and children and family life, thinking of a particular homily Fr. Flores said that showed zero understanding of the disabled or families with children, and then this matter came to light.  SIGH.  Finding myself, yet again, trying to explain these situations that I am tired of explaining.
I have been reassured that seminaries are vetting such matters so much better when I asked how are parents supposed to trust our children at convents and seminaries, thinking of the orgies my uncle witnessed at Spring Hill College in the 1960s and he withdrew asap…this priest is a young priest…what are we supposed to do?  This is the fourth? priest in 4 parishes who has engaged in such behavior at parishes we have attended in the last 18 years–and they were all younger priests. The formation problems have not been resolved–apparently, one of the priests at his seminary agrees there needs to be major reform. The seminaries are NOT doing their jobs–but the question is– can they?!  How am I supposed to explain, yet again, to my children and try to comprehend this evil!
This is why we need married or widowers as priests you know, like the original 11. Old enough to have figured yourself out, have a wife to guide and support you in the realm of women and children, and old enough to stand up to sin when you see it. Old enough to have the wisdom the young need, to counsel through the ins and outs of life. The Rock the Church was built on was St. Peter, a married (possibly widower, but St. Clement said married, and either way, he had a wife!) fisherman, accustomed to constant hard work and intimately aware of the family life and knew how to preach on it, with the wisdom of his wife and children and his mother-in-law. That’s the Rock.
Also, he was directly counseled by Our Lady: the daughter, the virgin, the cousin, the wife, the mother, the widow–the spectrum of woman’s experience, including as well the wives of the apostles (why are they denied?) and other female relatives and friends. Are pastors and bishops and the Pope listening to women representing the fullness of the female experience and directly referencing their voices when they consider the implementation of policies, disciplines, and doctrine? (Hint: largely, NO.)
I think women being priests is as ridiculous as men being nuns, but I do think it should be a requirement for such visible counsel, as it is directly mirroring what the Church had, from the beginning–the Church is the Bride of Christ, not the Groom. And from the Beginning, before the Fall even, God said it was NOT good for the man to be alone.  If a priest is truly a celibate, he should be required to have his mother (and father) live with him in the rectory or another female relative and her family. You know, like Jesus did? If He chose to need it, why do we think priests, who are supposed to act in the person of Christ, do not?
And, yes, of course, I am praying for everyone involved–St. Mary’s pastor Father Wilson was breaking down in tears and shaking horribly when he bravely told us from the pulpit–versus NEVER telling us like in other parishes. Pray for him and for all the priests who are having to deal with this. He has consistently encouraged everyone to call the police right away if they have been victims of abuse and has signs up everywhere with that information and with the phone numbers–his leadership should be modeled by anyone who runs any organization with children.
My late husband wrote this 8 years ago with similar thoughts.
adult alone anxious black and white

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Priests and Honey-do Lists

The question isn’t why don’t we have women priests. The question is why aren’t clergy formed to listen to women and generally speaking, think of most of their concerns and requests as their “honey do lists.” I am obviously not meaning sinful or heretical requests. Are priests willing to admit mistakes and apologize?  Do they know their Bride?  Is the Church a bride or a groom?
When we did engaged encounter, our priest told us the question asked before accepting a seminarian was, “Would he make a good husband?” If the answer was no, then he wasn’t admitted.
But are priests trained to listen to women, like Christ did to His Mother and every woman He encountered? Before I met Father Michael and Father Wilson, I would say definitively, no. Many priests were taught clericalism and chauvinism and have no concept of what it’s like to be a husband or what women go through as wives and mothers.
The demeaning of the married priesthood is sacrilegious. Seeing the nastiness spilled about it seems to prove we desperately need them and the high percentage of the clergy who have women issues. The Khouriyas of the East are Godsends. Their husbands intimately know the needs of their wives and children. Their wives support and console them, and yes, set them straight.
I see the Mother Angelica meme going around. Mother Angelica was constantly at odds with “progressive” bishops and priests and said she would blow EWTN sky high before she would let them have it. No woman in the Church today has the power that Mother Angelica had. I don’t think they ever will. Arguably, she is the reason the Church is still going as well as it is in the USA. But it is in spite of many of the clergy, not because of them. Notice she hasn’t been fast-tracked to canonized sainthood.
Maybe we should start Mass with the women saying, “They have no more wine.” The men come in and the women say, “Do whatever He tells you.” Then, the point would be made. Men serve at the women’s requests, just as Christ did. He did not always answer exactly as expected–He usually did a slight correction or test of faith–but He always answered affirmatively. He never turned them away.  The hemorraghing woman had her request answered just by touching His hem.

12 June: Blessed Alphonsus Mary Mazurek and Companions

Elijah's Breeze

June 12
BLESSED ALPHONSUS MARY MAZUREK,
Priest of Our Order

AND COMPANIONS, Martyrs

Optional Memorial

He was born in 1891 at Baranowka, near Lubartow, Poland. He entered the Order of Discalced Carmelites in 1908, taking the religious name Alphonsus Mary of the Holy Spirit. He was ordained a priest and appointed as a professor while dedicating himself to the education of youth. Afterward, he served in his Order as prior and bursar. In 1944, after having been arrested by the troops that had invaded his country, he was shot on 28 August at Nawojowa Gora, near Krzeszowice. He was beatified by John Paul II on 13 June 1999, together with many other Polish martyrs.

From the common of several martyrs; psalms from the current weekday

Office of Readings

Second Reading
From the addresses of Pope John Paul II
(OR 7-8 June 1999 p. 11; 18/6/1999, p. 4)

Blessed are those…

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Gallery

Catherine of Siena

This gallery contains 9 photos.

Originally posted on Charlotte was Both:
Today, of course, is her feastday. From a couple of years ago, a column in Aleteia  that is basically an excerpt from the book Praying with the Pivotal Players and the sections on Catherine: Blood.…

Dorothy Day, a Communist?

I am a volunteer for reading her diaries and typing them out. I am still confused over these issues, as if they are as bad as people claim, then how did she even get named as Servant of God? OTOH, the child abuse scandals of the Church were breaking as they railroaded the canonizations of Pope John Paul II and John the XXIII, who seemed to know of the matters but handled them disastrously. So…SIGH. I still do not see how the Church gets around Acts 2.

The Catholic Eye

I’ve been studying this issue for some time and have reached the conclusion that Dorothy Day had so conflated Communism and Catholicism in her own mind that she saw them as one and the same; which is the only explanation I can find for her lifetime support of Communist governments and ideology, co-existing with devout practice of her Catholic faith.

Another clear mark, in my opinion, of her lifetime adherence to Communism was that she never denounced it or its evils to protect others from becoming ensnared, which is what most people, yours truly included, do once they see a past way of life clearly for the wrong path it was.

The seminal book which cleared up the confusion I had about Dorothy Day, who I once admired, was that by Dr. Carol Byrne, The Catholic Worker Movement, 1933-1980: A Critical Analysis, which, considering Day has been put forward…

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Wounded Surgeon, Wounded Patient

My husband John C. Hathaway died in October 2018, age 41, and he suffered from a connective tissue disorder called Marfan Syndrome his entire life. He had chronic, excruciating pain, fatigue, asthma, dislocated lenses (wore trifocals), subluxed joints, low muscle tone, and aneurysms in his brain and aorta. In the last months of his life, he developed seizures.

He talks about his suffering on this blog, and how he eventually accepted it as fully walking in the footsteps of Christ.  I do think it is something we as Catholics need to focus on, the redemptive suffering, that He came not to just suffer for us, but with us.  My husband was mocked by some Catholics for not being healed. It really angered him as such thinking gives us a false understanding of Christ’s Love.  

As I have greatly struggled with grieving my husband’s loss and wondering did I do everything I could for him, I contemplated the Holy Family, particularly St. Joseph’s death.  I have seen the focus so much on St Joseph’s death being happy, that we seem to leave out the fact that it was also completely devastating for Mary and I think in some sense, Jesus.

Jesus could have healed Saint Joseph and he could have lived a longer life to be with Mary. St. Joseph literally had the Best Physician, and yet he still suffered and died– a consolation God gave me when I wondered had I done enough.  I believe in His Divine Wisdom, that He allowed his foster father to die, so that He would know that excruciating suffering, along with Mary. Whenever Christ references a widow or an orphan, He is speaking from that personal pain. He also allowed his death, to remind us that being healed in this world is but for a time so we can continue to serve Him–whether He allows us to suffer or be healed has nothing to do with our personal holiness-it is only by dying and rising with Him that we are fully healed.  My husband also loves(d) TS Eliot, and he recorded part of Eliot’s “Four Quartets,” The Wounded Surgeon.

https://youtu.be/hr63lWbWpDk

It is a meditation on Good Friday.  My husband recorded this a few days before his sixteen hour surgery to replace his descending aorta, which resulted in a 3 month hospital stay, mainly in cardiac ICU, hooked up to life support. He miraculously lived 5 more years and 6 months and 2 weeks.

brown and silver cross table decor

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“Our only health is the disease
If we obey the dying nurse
Whose constant care is not to please
But to remind of our, and Adam’s curse,
And that, to be restored, our sickness must grow worse.
The whole earth is our hospital
Endowed by the ruined millionaire,
Wherein, if we do well, we shall
Die of the absolute paternal care
That will not leave us, but prevents us everywhere.”

We use that line a lot when things are not going as we wished.