Tips for serving at the altar

We were talking with the kids over dinner about the question of serving at the altar.  I recounted my top lessons/anecdotes from my brief time as an altar boy:

1. Put the cruets on the table:
The very first time I served, with little training, Father whispered, after I brought him the cruets, “You can put them down now, John.”
I did.
On the floor.

2. Try not to set the church on fire.
I’m pretty sure the first time I was asked to put the candles out, I nearly knocked them over with the little snuffer things.
I definitely recall the first time I was asked to *light* the candles and explained that I didn’t know how to light a match.

3. Remember to breathe.
Father said, “When we get back to the vestibule, stand there and don’t move until I say so.”
So I did.
I stood there as perfectly still as I could. After about 20 minutes, Father said to my dad, “I think John’s catatonic!”

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