Stunning Revelation in Biblical Exegesis!

Upon reflection of the convergence of April 1 and Holy Thursday in 2010, I had a thought that began nearly a year of research.

I hereby announce my conversion to the Baptist Church.

You see, I have spent the last year researching this question, and have found out that there are two words that appear in the earliest versions of Matthew 26:26-29 and related passages in Mark, Luke and 1 Corinthians which do not appear in the modern translations.

Further, I have determined that, in fact, the first Holy Thursday would have occurred on April 1 in 27 AD (accounting for the fact that we know Christ had to be born before 6 BC because Herod the Great died in 4 BC, so the most likely year for the death of Christ according to otherwise traditional rendering would be 27 AD).

Here is how the Matthew 26:26 passage reads in the RSV:

26 “Now, as they were eating, Jesus took bread, and broke it, and gave it to his disciples and said, “Take, eat; this is my body.” 27 And he took a cup, and when he had given thanks he gave it to them, saying, “Drink of it, all of you; 28 for this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins. 29 I tell you I shall not drink again of this fruit of the vine until that day when I drink it new with you in my Father’s kingdom.

However, if these newly discovered manuscripts are any indication, there should be two words between verses 28 and 29; scholars are arguing that they should be declared verse 28.5:

“APRIL FOOL!”

Thus, I am becoming a Protestant, because they’ve been saying all along that the Last Supper is nothing more than an April Fool’s joke, and it appears they are right.

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